Hello! It’s good to be back.
Wanna know the best thing about 2017??? I had no dramatic visits to the ER, no new crazy diagnosis, I spent the entire year eating solid paleo food, and enjoy well working medical equipment through the year. The worst thing that happened was a sprained ankle in October which led to two months of not exercising and 15 extra pounds packed on as a result.
However, The closing of 2017 was tough emotionally. My sweet Grandma passed in at the end of October, which was an interesting transition for my family. During the summer I ended a relationship. There are no hard feelings and the separation was the best decisions for us both, but that didn’t make it easy. Then the Holiday rush began and with so much change in family dynamic, it was plain and simply busy. I got caught up and lazy in my health, emotions and here in the blog...
In reflection, I turned back and looked at last year, at first I was sad. I missed my Grandma, at times I felt a little bitter about the breakup, and was ridiculously frustrated with the weight gain. But then I stopped, and felt like crying for joy. I was healthy, standing, and was back to running in the sunshine. I was the most COMPLETE I had been in YEARS. I had been given 365 days of medical peace. That realization made me feel like crying for joy, and it was worth all the emotional turmoil. I was FILLED WITH JOY. I was so THANKFUL and EXCITED about the “good” health I had experienced this last year.
A blogger and cookbook author I love, Danielle Walker often talks about how when dealing with grief and loss it is hard to believe that there is “light at the end of the tunnel”. She uses the term in reference to child loss. When I read her story I couldn't help thinking about the constant
grief that comes with chronic disease.
Because when it comes to incurable disease like diabetes, crohn's and lupus, there is no end to of the tunnel. Life with invisible disease is so wearying. But one of the things author Danielle Walker says is that there are "lights in that tunnel". Times of hope and joy amidst the darkness, that give us hope and courage to carry on. 2017 was a light in my tunnel. I carry that light into 2018. With the hope that my health, though not very good a lot of the time and very hard to carry on a daily basis, will continue to be a steady methodical fact of life.
Where were your lights in the tunnel in 2017? It could be as simple as a sunny day sitting by your neighborhoods pool. Or watching an evening snow storm from your bedroom window with Christmas carols playing in the background. A kiss from your significant other or a hug from your child, grandchild, niece,nephew, parent or friend. A clean bill of health, a new medication that gave you some pain relief? A new allergy free recipes that made your day.
Look for these lights, however big or small and bring them with you through the tunnel of life.
You’ve got this.
